My sister (Han's mom) got married last weekend in her fiance's dad's backyard...in Helena, Montana. There is one, count 'em ONE, direct flight from Minneapolis to Helena, which got us there at 11:30pm. No fancy mountain pictures to be had at that time of night, but Husband and I were greeted by this: I SEE… Continue reading Montana in a minute or less…
Author: Jess
Amateur historian, mythology enthusiast, writer, reader, sarcastic weirdo, cancer survivor. Author of Defying Shadows: For Witches and Pagans Battling Cancer and Chronic Illness.
Eyeore and Woody. (and Oompa Loompa Flower Children, if we’re counting ALL the weird today)
In today's edition of Townhome Twits, Eyeore. But first...today at lunch I (foolishly) drove over to the strip mall with Byerlys (grocery store) so I could feed my book addiction spend too much money eat at Barnes & Noble. And read. This is the same Byerlys where a random old lady accosted me with racist commentary about… Continue reading Eyeore and Woody. (and Oompa Loompa Flower Children, if we’re counting ALL the weird today)
I Am Not a Dude, Yahoo. Stop Offering Me Women.
My yahoo email address isn't particularly masculine, so I'm mildly amused and somewhat disturbed that I received the following emails in my Spam folder this morning: Sexy Brides! Hot Russian and Ukrainian Brides Looking For Love Because a husband isn't enough: I NEED the drama of another wife in the house. Sister wife I am… Continue reading I Am Not a Dude, Yahoo. Stop Offering Me Women.
I Scared the Legoland Clerks: Just Call me Darth Creepiness
I should not be allowed out in public. The other day I got to hold heads in the palm of my hand. Joffrey Baratheon would wet his pants!Clearly this is not a power I should possess...because after my initial snicker my first thought was "I need a bunch of these to put on toothpick spikes… Continue reading I Scared the Legoland Clerks: Just Call me Darth Creepiness
Snakipeder Defense League: ACTIVATE!
So this showed up on Facebook today. thanks, J.H.Heimdal's Facebook pageAnd of course my IMMEDIATE reaction was to consider the value of a Viking Squirrel Horde, preferably in full Berserker mode, to send into the crawlspace under my house. To attack and kill the Snakipeder(s) under there. Because I planted a container vegetable garden on… Continue reading Snakipeder Defense League: ACTIVATE!
When Snow White Gets Old (and Crotchety…and probably demented)
Townhome TwitsEpisode 2: The Demented Disney PrincessThis post is fairly rambly, but in my defense I did amuse the hell out of myself by creating a new creature word. You're welcome, and I'm not one bit sorry. Kitty corner from our house there lives an early-retired woman who's last (patient) son moved out to California… Continue reading When Snow White Gets Old (and Crotchety…and probably demented)
Xena Warrior Princess Trampled Tuesday
You guys, today I found THIS * and all Townhome Tales were totally diverted by AWESOME.Let's just take a moment, shall we, and contemplate the utter fabulousness that would be if Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, and of course Argo all came back to TV. Sigh. *(Should you not feel like randomly clicking Huffington Post links, Lucy Lawless has hinted at the… Continue reading Xena Warrior Princess Trampled Tuesday
Ole!
(Disclaimer: I wrote this yesterday before we actually came home, and couldn't get good enough interwebz to post it...more to come!). We're heading home tomorrow morning after a week of this:to ishy 60 degree rain. Ah well, vacation was relaxing. And as usual there are fabulous and "really? What the fuck?" moments, such as: Met… Continue reading Ole!
Inappropriate Vacation Picture!
Due to some strange and fun mixup, Husband and I went back to our room* after dinner in our fancypants Mexican resort and discovered this. Husband and I will be married 10 years this Halloween. While it's all romantic and shit to say "aww honey, it feels like we're newlyweds" we all know that's not true… Continue reading Inappropriate Vacation Picture!
Merida, she is NOT (a teaser-trailer for the Demented Disney Princess post)
This is not a real post. I'm going to sunny gorgeous Cancun tomorrow for a week with the recovering husband (dude, after the horrible fall/winter we had, it's time for a fricken cocktail on the beach!). Depending on his vice-grip on the iPad, I may or may not have an opportunity to post rude pictures… Continue reading Merida, she is NOT (a teaser-trailer for the Demented Disney Princess post)
No Pithy Phrase 