In the time before time, a desperate King searched for a way to trap the monster his wife created. An inescapable prison to hold a creature so terrifying and bloodthirsty the King couldn't keep it in his court, yet, being a canny and ruthless man, the King knew he could use his wife's monster to… Continue reading Mythic Monday: The Boy Who Flew Too High
Author: Jess
Amateur historian, mythology enthusiast, writer, reader, sarcastic weirdo, cancer survivor. Author of Defying Shadows: For Witches and Pagans Battling Cancer and Chronic Illness.
Mythic Monday: Huldra
I haven't Mythic Monday'd in a while...but post-Samhain we move into the traditional storytelling season. It seems appropriate to begin with tonight's Scandinavian myth, since the Norse were serious about their stories during the long, dark winter nights (not unlike the great-grandmas who can't see you tonight because their STORIES are on T.V.).Disclaimer: you stopped… Continue reading Mythic Monday: Huldra
The Trials and Tribulations of a Jedi Dog.
Chewy has been particularly unimpressed with us lately. Ok let's be honest: he's perfectly fine with Husband. He's less than thrilled with me. In the past week, he's burned his tongue off*, endured humiliating tortures, and been denied wintertime treats. All because he has the unfortunate happenstance of birth to be reincarnated as a giant Star Wars… Continue reading The Trials and Tribulations of a Jedi Dog.
No, I Don’t Know Why Either.
I don't have enough of one topic for a funny post tonight, but I have a bunch of weird episodes from the past few days I thought I'd share. Earlier this week, I found the following in my cube garbage can at work: But WHY is this even a question?WHAT THE FUCK does any of that mean?… Continue reading No, I Don’t Know Why Either.
Molon Labe
This is not a funny post. It's likely to cause me some hate mail (or hate-facebooking, I suppose). Ah well.I am completely NOT shocked, nor even mildly surprised, about the CIA torture report. What DOES dishearten me are the variations of "This is why I don't give a fuck that we tortured terrorists" memes on… Continue reading Molon Labe
"Mrs. Titts" isn’t an empty title, people.
Today, I was coerced by a pushy coworker to PARTICIPATE in group "fun" activities. I think work fun activities should involve alcohol and the ability to watch people make idiots of themselves. Well, I suppose I got half of that. We were "festive" and made gingerbread houses. Because what's better at an insurance company than… Continue reading "Mrs. Titts" isn’t an empty title, people.
Oh Skymall…you dirty dirty bird…
I went home (to the tundra) last weekend. It was an adventure. First, I was hit on by the dude next to me, Chad from downtown Minneapolis, on the plane. Chad insisted I'm 10 years younger than I am. Score.For me. He did not score. Bummer for you, Chad, but you were quite charming and I… Continue reading Oh Skymall…you dirty dirty bird…
The Houpocalypse Is Upon Us
Earlier this week I attempted to see whether I could look forward to drowning in a mudpit or roasting in a dust loud during my Saturday morning lead-the-horses-til-my-legs-scream hiking volunteer work.Apparently there won't be any, since the news site I used indicated the world ends today at 3pm. And, there will be no weekend. It was nice… Continue reading The Houpocalypse Is Upon Us
Updated for awesome. So…How Many Can I Request??
So, yesterday it occurred to me that elevators are a veritable buffet of potential hotness. I mean really, firefighters at the push of a button*? *I KNOW the button is for firefighters' use, not an awesome Bat signal for buff heroic types of either sex. **this is not a real post. But I'm back: real posts commencing forthwith! UPDATE:… Continue reading Updated for awesome. So…How Many Can I Request??
Spam Day! Because Wizards Reduce Belly Fat…
So, what exactly is "forskolin"?? Because I'm not gonna lie: it sounds like foreskin, and that's just creepy as hell. Also, while it's possible penises (penii??) can help with weight loss (sex is exercise, right?), all I can think of here is some alchemical potion of foreskin and lanolin. Some creeptastic grizzly wizard in moldy robes, frantically… Continue reading Spam Day! Because Wizards Reduce Belly Fat…
No Pithy Phrase 