Tag: tube full of AWESOME

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No Ma’am, Bees Don’t Have Teeth.

Jess4 Comments

Another weekend sitting at the First Aid gate at Renaissance Festival. Another weekend of things. Saturday a drunk (sigh) woman tried to impale her head on a fence post. She succeeded in splitting her lip from nostril down so thoroughly she likely needed multiple sets of stitches. Someone thought First Aid should have an oxygen… Continue reading No Ma’am, Bees Don’t Have Teeth.

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Renaissance Festival and Alcohol: A Perfect Storm of Fools.

Jess6 Comments

Last year at this time I found amusement in the various hospital oddities that I focused on while husband was in the ICU. It's really weird to think that today, one year ago, I was hanging out in a hospital room with a broken, unconscious spouse and no idea what the hell was going to… Continue reading Renaissance Festival and Alcohol: A Perfect Storm of Fools.

I…There is NOTHING Appropriate To Say About This (NOT Miley Cyrus Related)
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I…There is NOTHING Appropriate To Say About This (NOT Miley Cyrus Related)

Jess4 Comments

I don't understand it, but I'm highly entertained.  What the hell IS "Jess hair" and...just...WHY??I do not...know, but apparently multiple readers found my blog this way. In case anyone is wondering, there was no 1600's Mini-Doughnut Truck on the Renaissance Festival site this season (but I DID see an oxygen tank and a power… Continue reading I…There is NOTHING Appropriate To Say About This (NOT Miley Cyrus Related)

And then this happened…
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And then this happened…

Jess1 Comment

I'm on my second Starbucks today, so it's possible I'm slightly shaking as type this wired. But I think I'd be both disturbed and amused by this even if I was caffeine-sober. WTF: CAMLAMBEN! It's like TurDuckEn, only...not even a little. I don't have a reference for this...it's from Facebook (the source of all things… Continue reading And then this happened…

I Scared the Legoland Clerks: Just Call me Darth Creepiness
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I Scared the Legoland Clerks: Just Call me Darth Creepiness

Jess7 Comments

I should not be allowed out in public. The other day I got to hold heads in the palm of my hand. Joffrey Baratheon would wet his pants!Clearly this is not a power I should possess...because after my initial snicker my first thought was "I need a bunch of these to put on toothpick spikes… Continue reading I Scared the Legoland Clerks: Just Call me Darth Creepiness

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Xena Warrior Princess Trampled Tuesday

Jess1 Comment

You guys, today I found THIS * and all Townhome Tales were totally diverted by AWESOME.Let's just take a moment, shall we, and contemplate the utter fabulousness that would be if Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, and of course Argo all came back to TV. Sigh. *(Should you not feel like randomly clicking Huffington Post links, Lucy Lawless has hinted at the… Continue reading Xena Warrior Princess Trampled Tuesday

Ole!
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Ole!

Jess1 Comment

(Disclaimer: I wrote this yesterday before we actually came home, and couldn't get good enough interwebz to post it...more to come!). We're heading home tomorrow morning after a week of this:to ishy 60 degree rain. Ah well, vacation was relaxing.  And as usual there are fabulous and "really? What the fuck?" moments, such as:  Met… Continue reading Ole!

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Merida, she is NOT (a teaser-trailer for the Demented Disney Princess post)

Jess3 Comments

This is not a real post. I'm going to sunny gorgeous Cancun tomorrow for a week with the recovering husband (dude, after the horrible fall/winter we had, it's time for a fricken cocktail on the beach!). Depending on his vice-grip on the iPad, I may or may not have an opportunity to post rude pictures… Continue reading Merida, she is NOT (a teaser-trailer for the Demented Disney Princess post)

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Jeepers, Creeper…you’re a sneaky peeper!

Jess7 Comments

This began as a single (snarky) post about neighborliness, and the extreme lack of it, in my living situation. Then, while filling in the details about my crazy CIA neighbor, the suspected brothel and the demented Disney princess I realized I have WAY too much for a single post. Therefore, let me introduce a new unofficial-but-true… Continue reading Jeepers, Creeper…you’re a sneaky peeper!

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WOOHOO!!!

Jess4 Comments

This isn't a post. This is a goddamn celebration. Allie Brosh is back!!! http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.comGo forth and read her new posts immediately. They're funny, and awkward, and in my opinion utterly spot-on when it comes to dealing with deep depression. I'm so ridiculously happy she's back! I'll have a post tomorrow. Promise.