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And So, I Embrace Google’s Opinion Me

Remember how everyone tells me their sex and relationship issues? Did you know my husband is moving to Texas for 11 months next year for school (I am not, for financial and practical reasons...meaning, I'd like to keep my job until I get to the point they'll let me work from home full time, I… Continue reading And So, I Embrace Google’s Opinion Me

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Groupon May Be Trying To Kill Me

First of all, I'm amused that the ad at the top of my Yahoo mail today is for makeup, when I rarely (if ever) WEAR makeup and can NEVER be called "haute" in any way.Also, in MN the word "Haute" is rarely used at all. When it is (recently popping up in food magazines and… Continue reading Groupon May Be Trying To Kill Me

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Cosmic Lost Socks Will Now Be Washed, Fluffed and Folded.

Remember the Soul Retriever?Apparently she now provides "aura cleansing" as an additional service.I'm unclear as to whether she cleans the pieces of the soul she retrieves for you, or if she just does an overall swiffering. Personally, I would think any retrieved piece of the soul would need cleansing, because you just don't know where… Continue reading Cosmic Lost Socks Will Now Be Washed, Fluffed and Folded.

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Fest Food AND The Weekly Stupid Wrap Up

I realize some of these should have pictures, but ultimately I'm too busy either laughing (or gagging) to do so. I know most of my Fest posts are about people being dumb: to start this post I'd like to suggest the tastiest things I've found at the MN Renaissance Festival. Deep Fried Jalapeno Cream Cheese… Continue reading Fest Food AND The Weekly Stupid Wrap Up

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No Ma’am, Bees Don’t Have Teeth.

Another weekend sitting at the First Aid gate at Renaissance Festival. Another weekend of things. Saturday a drunk (sigh) woman tried to impale her head on a fence post. She succeeded in splitting her lip from nostril down so thoroughly she likely needed multiple sets of stitches. Someone thought First Aid should have an oxygen… Continue reading No Ma’am, Bees Don’t Have Teeth.

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Renaissance Festival and Alcohol: A Perfect Storm of Fools.

Last year at this time I found amusement in the various hospital oddities that I focused on while husband was in the ICU. It's really weird to think that today, one year ago, I was hanging out in a hospital room with a broken, unconscious spouse and no idea what the hell was going to… Continue reading Renaissance Festival and Alcohol: A Perfect Storm of Fools.

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I…There is NOTHING Appropriate To Say About This (NOT Miley Cyrus Related)

I don't understand it, but I'm highly entertained.  What the hell IS "Jess hair" and...just...WHY??I do not...know, but apparently multiple readers found my blog this way. In case anyone is wondering, there was no 1600's Mini-Doughnut Truck on the Renaissance Festival site this season (but I DID see an oxygen tank and a power… Continue reading I…There is NOTHING Appropriate To Say About This (NOT Miley Cyrus Related)

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And then this happened…

I'm on my second Starbucks today, so it's possible I'm slightly shaking as type this wired. But I think I'd be both disturbed and amused by this even if I was caffeine-sober. WTF: CAMLAMBEN! It's like TurDuckEn, only...not even a little. I don't have a reference for this...it's from Facebook (the source of all things… Continue reading And then this happened…

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I Scared the Legoland Clerks: Just Call me Darth Creepiness

I should not be allowed out in public. The other day I got to hold heads in the palm of my hand. Joffrey Baratheon would wet his pants!Clearly this is not a power I should possess...because after my initial snicker my first thought was "I need a bunch of these to put on toothpick spikes… Continue reading I Scared the Legoland Clerks: Just Call me Darth Creepiness

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Xena Warrior Princess Trampled Tuesday

You guys, today I found THIS * and all Townhome Tales were totally diverted by AWESOME.Let's just take a moment, shall we, and contemplate the utter fabulousness that would be if Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, and of course Argo all came back to TV. Sigh. *(Should you not feel like randomly clicking Huffington Post links, Lucy Lawless has hinted at the… Continue reading Xena Warrior Princess Trampled Tuesday