I was informed this afternoon that the 'lady occultist' in the Duluth Skywalk NOW offers "paranormal investigation" along with "soul retrieval." I am thoroughly intrigued. How exactly does one retrieve a soul? Perhaps more importantly, how exactly does one LOSE* a soul? Is it like doing the laundry and the washer/dryer eats a sock? "Oops,… Continue reading UPDATED: It’s like a divining rod for cosmic lost socks…
Tag: this isn’t porn
Go Ahead: Call Me Lazypants.
Do you know what happens when I have weeks and weeks off of work between the end of my contract and the beginning of a new position? NOTHING. So far:I've gotten utterly hooked on the Kevin McKidd episodes of Grey's Anatomy, even though I'd been warned not to get into that show (because goddammit, I'm… Continue reading Go Ahead: Call Me Lazypants.
I Am Not Resolute, Bitches!
I'm wholly unfunny this week, partially due to the chest cold from hell which forced me to not-sleep on the couch one night (as opposed to not-sleeping in bed) so Husband could get SOME shut-eye. He's back to work full time, and I'm currently unemployed, therefore in all fairness he needed sleep more than me.… Continue reading I Am Not Resolute, Bitches!
It’s a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy!
Not this one: Creepy Walken Face Courtesy of IMDB.comAlthough I did discover (while wasting time on IMDB.com finding that picture) that the same dude who did Highlander did The Prophecy movies. Cool. But no, that's not the prophecy I meant. Nor is the solstice/endoftheworld/apocalypse my subject today, despite "oh god, oh god, we're all… Continue reading It’s a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy!
CLIMB INTO THE HANDBASKET…and hang the hell on.
If you're wondering, I'm TOTALLY using that title for my as-yet-ill-conceived memoir. That's right: "climb into the handbasket" was one of the many fucked-up ways people found this blog. Here are a few others: "i'm in love with my same sex therapist" - I'm fairly certain I've never blogged about this. Should I ever I'll… Continue reading CLIMB INTO THE HANDBASKET…and hang the hell on.
I’m Wonder Woman…without the sexy costume.
My grossly neglected dogs (who have punished me for recent lack-of-attention by killing birds, eating bad Halloween candy and vomiting aluminum wrappers all over the floor under the table, and other manifestations of evil) had a vet appointment today. Both survived their respective tortures: Chewy is prone to ear infections: he has one (and it's… Continue reading I’m Wonder Woman…without the sexy costume.
My 250th Post Should Have Substance, right? (or, shit I’d do if Death was comin’ to GET me)
But instead, I'm pirating from myself. So I have this really good friend who is mostly bored to death with what most people do for fun (strip clubs, TV, movies, the bar...) and likes to discuss deep shit. I mean Deep Shit: he persistently asks me hard questions. Not rocket-science or calculus or how to bake… Continue reading My 250th Post Should Have Substance, right? (or, shit I’d do if Death was comin’ to GET me)
Update: This was going to be a real post, but then there was an angry dog. And Bellydancing Chewbaccas.
There's a real post coming, and the next flash fiction entry for my Seven Deadly Sins project (which was sidetracked by broken pelvis scaffolding and hospitals). In the meantime: My sister is a HUGE Viking's fan. I'm not a football fan in general (although I AM quite a fan of Vikings punter Chris Kluwe, but that's… Continue reading Update: This was going to be a real post, but then there was an angry dog. And Bellydancing Chewbaccas.
This is not real. Is it??
BaaRamEwe BitchesSeriously...I'm tempted to buy this and put it in Husband's office as an evil surprise Christmas present (since that'll be the next time he'll be able to get upstairs in our house).
Why I Bellydance (This is not a funny post. You probably don’t want to read it).
So I'm six feet tall. This has relevance, promise. By the time I was in fourth grade I was taller than everyone else AND I was getting boobs, because nature decided I needed multiple targets for the bullies in school. Since I was about eight I've been a pretty consistent failure at being a feminine… Continue reading Why I Bellydance (This is not a funny post. You probably don’t want to read it).
No Pithy Phrase 