This will haunt my dreams. Proof the interwebz are possessed? You're welcome. BEARLACC!!*An alien contemplating its next victim? A balding werewolf? (Team Jacob in 30 years!). A SyFy Saturday night Creature? Really, who knows? *Or it's a bear, after an unfortunate encounter with an overzealous barber and a set of industrial-strength clippers. Seriously, THIS is why… Continue reading WHAT THE HELL IS THIS??
Tag: not really sexy
These are not the turtles you’re looking for. Move along.
Someone found my blog by searching "gerard butler and the house of unicorns" which I can only assume is some sort of pre-"hitting-it-big" porn. Hmm. Excuse me while I surf the interwebz. In other news, motorcycle accidents suck. Insurance companies suck. Lawsuits suck. And for some reason. lawyers seem to think they're entitled to information… Continue reading These are not the turtles you’re looking for. Move along.
Yes Medusa, my hair IS trying to kill me (or: You won’t like it when it’s ANGRY)
The past few days have been a rollercoaster. Did you know I'm horridly susceptible to motion sickness? I wonder if I can get a prescription for an emotional-Dramamine-patch...So, the highs and lows in my fucked up universe in a 72 hour period: Had enough frequent flier miles to visit one of my most favoritest people on the… Continue reading Yes Medusa, my hair IS trying to kill me (or: You won’t like it when it’s ANGRY)
I don’t have a problem…
In follow up to my post extolling the remarkable awesomeness of Cait's present, I need to point out the awesomeness of Zack. Who gave me a Witchking helmet ring, a knitted "zombie" coffee cozy, and this: To be hung in my library/office. As a warning? Or an explanation... Indeed, it IS perfect for me.… Continue reading I don’t have a problem…
Gerard Butler and Unicorns (or why I haven’t blogged in January much)
January I've been unemployed, and as such I've been watching WAY too much TV, reading pagan-y books, and sleeping off some ongoing depression issues. Not really a valid excuse, but there you go. However, this week stuff happened that was blog-worthy, and so here I am. I've discovered I'm allergic to martial arts. Or vigorous… Continue reading Gerard Butler and Unicorns (or why I haven’t blogged in January much)
Back to Hell, Demon!
I was observed recently as being...inconsistent...between who I appear to be and who I am. It's a fair observation given by one of the slight handful of people in the world who know the real me, and 100% true in the context of the conversation. This post will likely be long and self-indulgent attempt to… Continue reading Back to Hell, Demon!
CLIMB INTO THE HANDBASKET…and hang the hell on.
If you're wondering, I'm TOTALLY using that title for my as-yet-ill-conceived memoir. That's right: "climb into the handbasket" was one of the many fucked-up ways people found this blog. Here are a few others: "i'm in love with my same sex therapist" - I'm fairly certain I've never blogged about this. Should I ever I'll… Continue reading CLIMB INTO THE HANDBASKET…and hang the hell on.
I met The Bloggess! And nearly made a mess in CVS. These are not related.
On my 35th birthday (which was Friday) I met Jenny Lawson. (I also received a beautiful necklace and various forms of most excellent sappiness from my husband, but those are mine and I'm not sharing). I stood in line for the book signing after hearing her read a chapter of her book, Let's Pretend This… Continue reading I met The Bloggess! And nearly made a mess in CVS. These are not related.
UPDATED AGAIN (WTF?): Um, That’s MRS. Titts, Actually.
Once again it's nearly time for the MN Renaissance Festival to begin. I've worked at Fest now for twelve years. I've been a t-shirt-and-mug-pusher, a beer wench, a balloon blower, a calligrapher, a gate guard, and even an entire BAND for the bellydancers (that's right, I OWNED running that ipod, bitches).And still after all that… Continue reading UPDATED AGAIN (WTF?): Um, That’s MRS. Titts, Actually.
"I rather like my lady bits – certainly enough so that I don’t want to purposefully electrocute them."
Apparently some of those shoes/stuff/clothing "membership" sites (which are really just another way to fill your inbox with crap you'll rarely buy but are fabulous time-wasters at work) also hock discount "personal massagers." Discount sex toys. DISCOUNT.My good friend recently signed up on a clothing-membership site. For clothes. Today she said "Why am I being stalked… Continue reading "I rather like my lady bits – certainly enough so that I don’t want to purposefully electrocute them."
No Pithy Phrase 