I...well, I got nothin. On the other hand, I don't have a tiny weener. Updated: you guys, I'm surrounded by dick jokes today. Wtf universe?? This was on my garbage can: I surrender.
Tag: What the HELL
O Captain, My Captain
I have a post on Yggdrasill ready for Mythic Monday, but then Robin Williams died. And I just can't bring myself to post anything about Norse mythology tonight. It's stupid, I know: I never met the man. I didn't know him at all. And yet I feel like weeping at the waste, at the sadness… Continue reading O Captain, My Captain
I Don’t Need Your Homegrown Dandelions, Gmail.
"Laughed the car and into tears." There is nothing I can say to top that. Gmail has been trumping Yahoo for weird spam lately...not for the offers, but for the random gibberish in the body of the emails. Because "homegrown dandelions." I'm baffled.
Updated: But…Is There Hypoallergenic Tattoo Ink For My Rabbit??
So, I have relatives visiting this fall and was looking for anything equestrian-related to maybe go do while they're here, because they'll be six months early for the Houston Rodeo. A coworker suggested the Harris County Fair, which will be near my house (woohoo! Convenient AND close). No joy: there's no horse stuff, just other livestock… Continue reading Updated: But…Is There Hypoallergenic Tattoo Ink For My Rabbit??
UPDATED: Why Yes, I DO Prefer Non-Test-Tube Men, Thanks
Sign on my way to work this morning:Homemade males*Now I'm 99% certain the males in my life of all species in all capacities are 100% homemade by their parents. No plastic Ken dolls here, and no test tube or clones. Of course, one can never be certain the body snatchers or Stepford scientists haven't been… Continue reading UPDATED: Why Yes, I DO Prefer Non-Test-Tube Men, Thanks
There Aren’t Enough Spanx In The World…
This isn't a real post. I just had to point out something horrid. You know, I don't pay a lot of attention to fashion. My ideal of dressing up is jeans instead of yoga pants. I noticed when the '80's invaded Target: leg warmers, off-the-shoulder sweatshirts. Headbands. diagonal stripes. It was a style horror show.… Continue reading There Aren’t Enough Spanx In The World…
Filed Under "What The HELL, Texas?"
See the smoke and the Firefighters? They're putting out a truck fire. What's left of the truck. Hi Firemen!So yesterday I was on the way back from Galveston to Houston on the freeway, when my super awesome friend Mary (she's driving) pulled off on an exit ramp because HOLY SHIT FIRE and smoke...which causes traffic.… Continue reading Filed Under "What The HELL, Texas?"
Ok Seriously Yahoo, I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE OFFERING HERE.
What the hell does this mean? What the FUCK is an American Parasite?THAT QUESTION IS RHETORICAL PEOPLE. No snarky political comments here. Really.Ok, first of all, if you begin this sort of inflammatory email with "Dear Friend" you're already losing credibility. When I can't actually copy any of the text (because doing so launches a… Continue reading Ok Seriously Yahoo, I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE OFFERING HERE.
Mythic Monday: Minotaur
Tonight's post is brought to you by request of a certain super awesome security dude/friend/geek extraordinaire. We're going back to Greek mythology tonight for one of the most iconic monsters ever. The Minotaur. I love this myth, because it's full of tragedy, horror, evil, physically improbable impregnation, and ultimately I can't help but root for… Continue reading Mythic Monday: Minotaur
Please Keep Your Feet Inside The Vomit Tank At All Times…
You guys, I may be just a wee bit tipsy and stuff because restaurants in Texas don't fuck around with the whole margarita in your Tequila in your margarita thing, and I apologize in advance if this post sucks. Or makes your tummy queasy. But why, for the love all that's holy or unholy...WHY? WHY… Continue reading Please Keep Your Feet Inside The Vomit Tank At All Times…
No Pithy Phrase 