So…I get quite a few spam comments that are filtered out by this platform (thank goodness) and I always review them before deleting because often they’re entertaining. The recent spate of “is cbd oil good for…” followed by a variety of ailments have been fun to read. This one, however, made me shake my head.
“Negging” is a manipulation technique most often seen in dating (and especially in online dating) that’s both cringeworthy and pathetic (and occasionally pitifully funny). Should you prefer a more formal definition: Negging (derived from the verb neg, meaning “negative feedback”) is an act of emotional manipulation whereby a person makes a deliberate backhanded compliment or otherwise flirtatious remark to another person to undermine their confidence and increase their need of the manipulator’s approval.[1] The term was coined and prescribed by pickup artists.[1]
Manipulation often doesn’t work well on me anyway (I have zero patience for that sort of bullshit) and negging has never worked. In general, I figure if a person doesn’t like something about me, they are welcome to pick themself up and fuck right off out of my presence. Telling me my writing sucks in a spam comment that’s pushing your bot-driven ad attempts works about as well as a dude telling me my hair could look better or I could be more interesting or thinner at the bar. I mean, I’m not that arrogant: it’s entirely possible my writing on any given day does suck, but the message . What made me laugh out loud, though is the context of the comment and the post it the bot responded to: a book review of a gothic horror story that turned out to be wonderfully disturbing and I thoroughly enjoyed. Happy to fail you with my review, weirdo spambot. Off you toddle.
In significantly more fun news, today’s post includes a woefully overdue second installment* of my bonus-child’s** blogging.
- *note: they wrote this a good while ago, and I am remiss in posting it. I did not edit their work, so there is a bit of temporal shift involved. That’s my fault.
- **note the 2nd: it is worth reminding readers that Stone is a teenager just getting into blogging. Therefore, again, I have not edited their work. I fully support their progression in finding voice and style, even though I rather dislike their use of stupid as a self-deprecation (which will be chatted about later) because they are, indeed, not at all stupid.
- ***note the 3rd: as a reminder, Dr. X is 15, Stone and Butterfle are nearly 13 y/o twins, and Siplex is 10. The cousins to whom Stone refers are Han, Evil, Rocket, and Groot: my niece and nephews.
Stone’s Shack #1
Welcome! Come sit by the fire as you listen to my stupidity.
Hello everybody!! It feels nice to be back!! It has been sometime *cough two days cough* since you learned about the infamous potato story. I have recently seen the post and read the comment. Regrettably it seems like everyone in my grade is obsessed with their phone. In fact, everyday before school people in my class can be seen playing games and sending photos to each other. While they are right next to each other.
Anyway I thought I’d tell you a little bit about myself and then tell you about what happened at a local Italian restaurant. I’m not sure if you can tell but I really enjoy writing. I pretend that I don’t laugh at stupid jokes Dr. X says and am trying to get the confidence to get into the theater realm. AND I HAVE SUCCEEDED!!! My school is putting on a play that takes place in Camelot and I get to be one of the knights of the round table!! I love dogs and have successfully convinced Jess to move in with the dogs. Jess, you are not getting them back. I have really enjoyed becoming familiar with Jess’s family and I adore all of my new cousins and Aunt and Uncle. Her family and friends are really nice and I’ve enjoyed meeting them because my Dad has like 2 friends that I don’t see unless it’s like a dart tournament but then I only see one of them. I don’t even really know most of his friends. Uh, that’s surprising. Anyway now it’s time for you to hear about the local Italian restaurant story.
So it’s a Thursday night and Dr. X has an important meeting he can’t miss and Butterfle wasn’t feeling the best so it was me, my dad, Jess, and Siplix. We ate a lot of spaghetti and Siplix gave me his bread, and like the crow that I am I hoarded it and proceeded to call them my bread children. I DON’T HAVE A PROBLEM YOU DO!! On our way to the car for some reason I screamed in the parking lot. I would like to again refer to where I don’t have a problem, but you do. Anyway on the car ride home Siplix and I got into an argument. It was just like a broken pencil, pointless. For some reason he decided he was sassier than me. Now, not sure if you know, but I am a teenager, he is not. I think you can see who is sassier. Turns out he is sassy. Obviously Jess was really entertained and Dad was heavily disappointed in us. Today I was talking about it with Dr. X and we got into an argument about who’s sassier. He told me that he has more “experience” being a teenager. What you are supposed to learn from this is that the boys are in kahoots and planning against me and not the fact that me and Dr. X have decided that Butterfle can be sassy if need be.
I hope you enjoyed the stupidness of this post and how long it is. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jess decides to chop it into two.
Indeed, I did not chop it in two.
No Pithy Phrase 