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I’m Done SHOULDing All Over Myself

Jess1 Comment

Screw resolutions.I've spent my entire life hearing "should" and some variation of "ought to (generally it's "otta").You should lose weight. You should eat better. You should write more. You should pay more attention. You should be sexier. You should be more professional. You shouldn't act so crazy. You should be more fun. You shouldn't hide.… Continue reading I’m Done SHOULDing All Over Myself

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Dear Yahoo Mail: There Are No Snakes In My Pants.

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This isn't a real post...just a moment of amusement.Today's winning Spam email (and by "winning" I mean most ridiculously humorous)?"Replace your pant snake with a PYTHON" by Pharmacy Online.Thank you, Pharmacy Online, but as I have no snakes in my pants and I have somewhat of a phobia of Snakes, Snakipeders, and other creatures...I TRULY… Continue reading Dear Yahoo Mail: There Are No Snakes In My Pants.

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Bored Sheep Farmers vs Ohio State Marching Band. Shepherds WIN.

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Remember the super cool college football marching band that made itself into a T-Rex that ate a dude? Wait. Read that sentence again. My life is fucking weird. http://youtube.googleapis.com/v/DNe0ZUD19EE&source=udsAnyway, this? Well. I do believe a group of really bored sheep farmers (aka shepherds) with some astounding choreography (and engineering) skills and really well trained sheepdogs… Continue reading Bored Sheep Farmers vs Ohio State Marching Band. Shepherds WIN.

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People, I Need a Brownie!

Jess2 Comments

I've been working a while now on a book (well, to be fair, on a couple of books). I cut a snippet into a 500 word scene and submitted it to a flash fiction contest in the summer. I didn't win, but I DID get some really excellent feedback, which I used to re-write (and… Continue reading People, I Need a Brownie!

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And Thus I Consider My Blog a Win.

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Search term that produced my blog today:"trampled by Xena"Win. I'm proud.I'll probably do a real post tomorrow. Today I'm basking in Xena-ness.

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UPDATED: Yahoo Seems To Think I’m a Lonely and Confused Dude (or in the midst of a spiritual and sexual identity crisis)

Jess3 Comments

Oh Yahoo spam mail, you do make my week awesome: Yesterday I got five separate invitations to join JDate. That would be the Jewish Dating service.Today (so far) I've received three Christian Mingle offers. And four different penis-enhancement-emails (viagra/cialis drugs, enlargements)Evidently I have a whole catalog of issues: small penis size, under-performing penis action (not surprising… Continue reading UPDATED: Yahoo Seems To Think I’m a Lonely and Confused Dude (or in the midst of a spiritual and sexual identity crisis)

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SyFy’s Next Sharknado: CARNICORN!

Jess3 Comments

Because who the fuck wouldn't watch a bad Saturday night movie with a flesh-eating-attack-unicorn?? People, it's goddamned genius: the ultimate symbol of innocence and purity ravaging a city with impalement carnagey death.  Somebody who's not me and can actually write scripts: get on that shit.I wonder if the Snakipeder Army could defend against Carnicorn...hmm.Also, the… Continue reading SyFy’s Next Sharknado: CARNICORN!

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This Is Not A Post: NOW READ THIS

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I have a post in-progress of a story I'm working on...but to be honest there was too much wine Doctor Who shenanigans last weekend and I didn't get it finished.In the meantime, I spent quite a bit of time yesterday drooling over books reading at Barnes & Noble yesterday, and while Husband finished a very… Continue reading This Is Not A Post: NOW READ THIS

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Bravery Isn’t Lack of Fear: It’s Action Despite Fear

Jess3 Comments

The Huffington Post had an article today titled The 8 Bravest Things I Ever Said. I'm intrigued.I have to say I disagree with snarking at people parked in a handicapped zone unless you know 100% that said person isn't handicapped AND they don't have a placard. Plenty of nosy-nannies snark at people who have every right… Continue reading Bravery Isn’t Lack of Fear: It’s Action Despite Fear

I Have No Good Title For This
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I Have No Good Title For This

Jess5 Comments

Since I'm lacking any full-post-worthy (sigh, I wrote that as "worty" at first...which is both gross AND makes me think of herbs...and beer) items I give you a bunch of random crap.1) I saw Ender's Game. No, I'm not sorry about seeing a movie based on a book that deals with issues like blind hatred… Continue reading I Have No Good Title For This